5 Questions with Mindi Flyth


Mindi’s Author Page

Hey, folks!   I am super-excited to publish 5 Questions with Mindifylth, the second installment in my series of interviews with TG artists!  Hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

1. What motivates you to create books and videos, particularly with TG themes?

I’ve been transgender as long as I can remember. Growing up I was always looking for books and videos with TG transformation themes, and the stuff I could find usually didn’t quite work for me. The writing was bad or it didn’t go into the TG aspect as much as I wanted, it was never quite right. I was compelled to create the kind of stories I wanted to see.

I’d written a few stories before it suddenly clicked for me that I could make characters funny or quirky and the dialogue didn’t have to just be super-sexy all the time. That became a big goal for me, to make characters seem more “real” than you’ll find in most fetish fiction.

2. What are your top three TG experiences in terms of books, films, videos, songs?

Well, I’m assuming you mean TG fantasy stuff, as opposed to things about the TG experience in the real world. (For more realistic things, I lovedThe Crying Game, Ma Vie en Rose and Hedwig and the Angry Inch.) For really formative fantasy things, I’ll have to cheat a bit. There were TG transformation or body swap episodes of shows like Gilligan’s Island and The Munsters that were just electrifying when I saw them in reruns as a kid. I can’t just pick one, so I’ll lump them together as childhood TG TV. Your recent article on Jack L. Chalker’s novel The Identity Matrixreminded me how that book hit me like a nuclear bomb when I first discovered it. The web was new then and I hadn’t read a lot of TG fiction, and that book just blasts you with all kinds of kinky transformations. A classic! Finally I’ll say Transformation Into Beauty, a short Youtube animation where a guy on a subway train abruptly transforms into a bride in a big poofy dress, and there’s no explanation for it at all. I loved it so much, it inspired my story Changed into a Bride! The transformation in that video lingers on all the sexy details and it actually influenced how I write my stories. I take my time with the transformations and try to make the reader really feel all of the changes.

3. In your work, the characters frequently experience forced changes. Yet, I know you’ve mentioned that you also like to have happy endings. Can you talk about your interest in forced changes as well as the happy endings?

Well, in my mind very few of my endings are truly unhappy. If some jerky guy ends up a hot, horny bimbo, everybody’s better off! Even if he bitches about his change, I always make it pretty clear that he’s having a lot of sexy fun in his new life. I’m not truly sadistic by nature and I don’t want my characters to just suffer forever. Either they learn to accept their new lives, or they love it but can’t admit it to themselves.

I’ve written a couple of stories that were much more sweet and gentle, like I Changed into My Wife… and I’m Having Her Baby! and my novel He’s Stuck as a Schoolgirl, and it was satisfying to create characters who were more nuanced and likable. But I’ll never get tired of a good old Twilight Zone-esque twist ending where some creep pays for his bad behavior with a lifetime of bimbohood!

4. Talk about getting started as a TG artist. What were your hopes, fears, concerns?

My hope was that I could learn a living doing this, and so far that’s actually worked. I am so grateful for that and I will never take it for granted. My fear is that the whole thing is too good to last. Every time I see a tiny dip in sales I think this is it, everything is falling apart! I love what I do so much that I live in fear of it going away.

5. What has been most positive aspect of putting your work out there for the world to see?

Every time somebody tells me they liked one of my stories, it’s a thrill. I’ve also been through some really bad stuff the last couple of years, like I had cancer, and writing these stories has given me a wonderful way to escape and process some of these things. When I was sick and scared it was very healing to spend some time imagining what it would be like to be an invulnerable fembot, or to write about regressing in age and becoming healthy, little and cute. I strongly suggest creative hobbies as a way to cope with bad times. I don’t know how I would’ve gotten through 2014 without my stories!


6. You have a new book out. What can readers look forward to in this one?

My new story, My Wife Changed Me into Her Lover’s Penis: The Ultimate Cuckold Fantasy, is a real departure. There’s no TG, but we follow a man who’s been turned into a penis and we get into the details of what sex is like for him. I previously wrote an eBook called Changed into a Pussy, and it wasn’t one of my best sellers but people who were into that fetish really liked it. Hopefully people will feel the same about this one. Some of my stories are about character first and sexy transformation second, and some of them are flat-out smut. This is definitely one of the latter! It’s super dark and kinky and if folks enjoy reading it half as much as I enjoyed writing it, they are gonna have a great time.

Mindi’s Newest Book

The Identity Matrix: (Spoilers)


I stumbled upon Jack Chalker’s The Identity Matrix while  browsing at a Dalton Books in the mall back in the 1980s.  This was before the Internet was big, before ebooks existed, and my search for media dealing with sex-change and TG issues involved spending a lot of time in libraries and bookstores just searching and searching through the books, looking for titles and covers and blurbs that hinted I might find some TG content, which at the time seemed rare.

And there it was, right in my hands, a book that seemed like it had come right out of my own imagination, tapping into and adding ideas to the thoughts and dreams I had been having;  a body-swap story, and one that featured a male character that kind of reminded me of myself– bookish, shy, bad with women,Victory Gonser finds himself trapped in a female body and forced to live her life.

The other body-swap media I’d found up to this point always shied away from sex, instead dealing with other gender issues such as clothes, objectification, behavioral challenges like putting on make-up or wearing high-heels.  But the The Identity Matrix delved into the questions of sexual identity, and especially after the mind-wipe scene which seared itself into my memory.

In this scene, Gonsor has been living as a woman for a time, but nefarious forces decide to erase his memory and make him believe he has always been a woman named Misty Ann Carpenter, a stripper and enthusiastically erotic woman.   The idea of him being given such a feminine name thrilled me, and the new life as a stripper, something that was so utterly female, and where he would be displaying his body to men as an object of pleasure–  a total reversal far more radical than say, a businessman becoming a business woman.   The scene went something like this, with the character hooked up to some sort of apparatus and a voice asking him questions:

What is your sex?


What is your sex?


What is your name?

“Victor Gonser.”

What is your name?

“Misty Ann Carpenter.”

It wasn’t working! She thought.  The mind swipe was failing.  She was Misty Ann Carpenter, and she would never forget it!

It was a powerful concept to me, frightening and alluring, that someone could be erased.  They could be turned into someone else.  Frightening because I didn’t like the idea I could be erased, and alluring because I longer to rewrite myself, to become someone different.

Later, the Victory and Misty personalities merge, and that is where I liked the character and the story best, because Victor now has the body language and behaviors of a flirty stripper, something which is noted by the other characters, and which he flaunts as he not only accepts but revels in his new identity that merges his male and female selves.

I know over the years some have criticized Chalker’s writing, the style, skill, maybe even his commitment to craft.  But I leave all of those questions to others.  To me, Chalker’s book was a rare and special document that came along at an important time in my life, and helped to both fuel my own explorations of identity as well as to realize that I was not alone, because someone else was writing the things I was feeling, and other people were reading it as well.

Check It Out On Amazon

NY Times on blurring gender lines


Breaking Free of Boundaries

I dream a dream of fashion anarchy, where people just wear what they want depending on who they feel they are on a given day or a given time of life.

And unisex clothing is not the answer.

Today’s New York Times features an article on the blurring of gender lines in fashion, with more and more designers opting for unisex clothing lines in which all their items are sold without any male/female labeling or identification. The clothes are awesome, and I support and applaud anyone who likes them and wears them, but I long for a more expressive world.

And what would that more expressive world look like?  That world, to me, would include fashions that fell everywhere from the extremely feminine to the extremely butch, and in my world people could wear whatever they felt like on any given day in any given season.  If a woman wanted to dress in “dude” clothes, she could, or unisex, or if she felt like getting all dolled up and showing off all her curves, that would be fine, too on any given day for any reason.  Ditto a man.

What I see in the pictures that accompany the articles are a bunch of gorgeous, rail-thin models with androgynous features, all hints of curves or angularity hidden beneath loose, baggy clothes. The designer Kimberly Wesson, who wears her own unisex fashions, complains that her friends plead with her to wear a “sequined skirt” or to dress like “Joan from Madmen.”  Her designs are great, and she should wear the hell out of them, but why create a new set of restrictions in which unisex is an iron-bound fashion rule just as a inflexible and rigid a code as any other?  In which people are hiding their bodies?  In the name of being gender free, do we have to become gender-less?

I realize my vision for an expressive world that opens up opportunities for expression and includes more rather than less options may well be an unrealistic fantasy.  Even in my own writing I have yet to write a story where it exists, though maybe I will now that I think about it.  I think any trend that involves blurring of gender lines is a good trend.  The article asserts that more and more members of the younger generation are comfortable with gender free clothing, though, predictably, this trend is more female-centric as it has long been more acceptable for women to adopt men’s fashion that the other way around.

The changes are good, and I applaud all of the designers moving away from rigid notions of male and female clothing, but I want more.

I dream a dream of fashion anarchy, where people just wear what they want depending on who they feel they are on a given day or a given time of life.  I want total freedom all the time for everyone.

5 Questions with Video Artist Lilac Wren

photoLilac Wren

Today I am thrilled to be posting the first of my 5 questions interviews with artists who create works that fall into the world of genderfluid art, this one featuring the video artist Lilac Wren, who has an extremely popular and fun channel on You Tube.

1. What motivates you to create videos, particularly with TG themes?

From a very early age, I was fascinated by the idea of MTF transformation. Even as a child, I remember having fantasies and coming up with story ideas involving changes and imagining myself in those scenarios. Of course growing up, it wasn’t something that I ever felt I could share with anyone, thinking that it was weird and even unacceptable. But it stayed with me and I was always on the lookout for material that fed this need. It wasn’t until years later that I started to come across sites like TGComics and World Of TG that I really realized that I wasn’t alone in my feelings and that there was a whole TG community out there. It was extremely gratifying to finally know that my fantasies weren’t unusual or obscure like I’d always thought.  Plus so much more TG material was revealed to me. Though when I first got started making videos, it was strictly due to a lack of TG videos available.  I’d been collecting a library of movies with transformations and, in a very short time, I quickly amassed everything I could find out there. Outside of the Asian market, there’s really not a ton of TG video material available. But after coming across some YouTube videos, in particular TGTales, it occurred to me to try piecing together my own videos since I had exhausted my search of existing movies. Then once I got a taste of it, I loved the creative aspect of it. In particular, it allowed me to tell stories that I really wanted to see, rather than having to wait for someone else to create them.  It’s wonderful to have the opportunity and a medium to express my imagination.

2. What are your top three TG experiences in terms of books, films, videos, songs?

First I’d have to say TGTales’ videos in general, since that YouTube channel was my first real experience with edited videos and by far my biggest push to try creating my own. But more specifically, I’d say videos like “Feminized Husband Game Show” and “Man or Woman Gameshow”, where new subtitles are added to foreign language footage to give it an entirely new spin.  The next would have to be an old adult movie I first saw years ago called “Dr. Jeckel and Ms. Hide (1990)”. Outside of my own imagination, it was one of my earliest experiences in media with TG and definitely my first with adult content. If you can get past the dated look of it, I highly recommend checking it out. The lead played by Ashlyn Gere does a fantastic job of portraying the confusion and reluctance of the change, as well as the discovery, delight and opportunities that come with her new body. Don’t get me wrong though. It’s all played for comedy still, but it’s nicely done, particularly for a porn film. The third is much more recent. It’s a story by Minikisa on TG Storytime called “Of Heroes And Villains”. I read a lot of TG fiction, some good some bad. Minikisa’s work is very well-written. It’s funny, sensitive, inciteful, with great characters and pacing. And this particular story is based in a world of superheroes, which is just a plus for me. But what really sets it apart for me is the overall plot. Many times writers of TG fiction, including myself, fall into the trap of having the TG transformation and its aftermath be the entire story. That’s great in many cases and certainly works as a standalone story. But with Minikisa, even though the transformation is central and crucial to the plot, it’s just part of the overall story. There’s much more going on with character development and the overall story arc, making it not just a great TG story, but making it a great story, period.

3. The dynamic in a forced change like “A Taste of His Own Medicine” or “Female Transformation PSA” seems very different to me than in videos like Clothing’s Impact on Behavior, where the character agrees to the change.  How is the writing experience different for you in these two different kinds of changes?

I’ve never been comfortable with the term “forced” when it comes to the themes in my work. Particularly with the sexual content in many of them, that term can bring really horrible and unwanted connotations, even though “forced” is being used to describe the transformation specifically and not anything else. I know it’s splitting hairs but I much prefer a term like “involuntary”.  And although the forced fem theme is very frequent across TG material, that humiliation aspect of MTF isn’t really my thing. I always see the change as being positive, even if the subject of the change doesn’t necessarily see it that way, at least initially anyway. And that sort of goes to the root of how I generally treat the two scenarios differently when writing them. With an involuntary transformation, the situation would obviously be difficult for the subject of the change, so it makes it more interesting to write that turmoil they’re feeling. With a voluntary change, there’s no opportunity to write that same emotional difficulty. And even though with both scenarios, there’s still the opportunity to write about the discovery that comes with the transformation, the involuntary ones allow for a better sense of learning and revelation.

4. Talk about getting started as a TG artist. What were your hopes, fears, concerns?

I’d actually been creating my own videos for a year or two before I started posting them online on my site and, other than an occasional miss that I scrapped entirely, I was fairly happy with the outcome of them myself. So since they were strictly for me, I didn’t have any real concerns while creating them. Although there was always some fear of them being revealed and discovered by my real life, since I’d never shared that aspect of my life with anyone before. However things changed once I decided to start posting them online. Then of course, the biggest concern was whether people would think I was a freak for creating videos like this, particularly due to the adult content. I had no idea if there would be an appetite for this kind of material or if people might even be offended by it. I’d never shared them with anyone before so I’d had no feedback at all. I’d hoped that there would be others out there who were looking for more TG videos just like I was, but I just didn’t know for sure. Plus there was very little re-edited TG video content available, and no edited adult content that I knew of, so there wasn’t really a way knowing how it would be accepted. And getting beyond that, even though I was reasonably happy with my work, there was always the chance that people would think it was terrible. But in the end, I decided it was worth risking to see if, like me, there were others out there who wanted this kind of thing.

5. What has been most positive aspect of putting your work out there for the world to see?

On my TG Creation site, I still can’t believe the response I’ve received after all these years. The comments have been almost entirely positive and my page views have continued to grow. Even during times that I haven’t been as productive, I’ll get comments asking for more. It’s really been incredibly encouraging to know not only that my work can bring entertainment to people, but also that I’m not alone in enjoying these types of video fantasies. On YouTube, it’s kind of a different story. A large portion of the comments I get there are complaining about how my videos are fakes, which gets a bit frustrating since I’ve always stated clearly in the notes that they were fictional, not to mention the amount of times I’ve had to reply that way to the comments too. However of the positive feedback there, the most rewarding for me has been from members of the transgender community. Not that the comments are all supportive but, for my stories to mean something to someone living, and potentially struggling, through real-life changes to become the person they were meant to be, it certainly puts the petty comments bashing into perspective and makes putting up with it far more worthwhile.

Thanks so much for taking the time to answer my questions! Check Lilac Wren’s Channel

All Screwed Up (Spoilers!)


Falling solidly in the center of the “Freaky Friday”-style body swap movie, All Screwed Up features a switch between a nerdy African American high-school girl with ADD and a popular white male jock with ambitions of earning a college scholarship.  It’s a walk a mile in my shoes kind of gender swap that offers some interesting wrinkles.

For one thing, the girl is an outcast, a poor dresser and an unwanted female who does not have to put up with any kind of boorish male attention.   So, when the guy becomes her, he doesn’t find himself suffering from unwanted sexual attention as is often the case, but instead, he is either ignored or bullied and ridiculed, especially by his old girlfriend.  He hates his life, and cannot imagine being stuck living as her not so much because he is now female but because as her he is a nobody.  Her body also suffers from ADD, and he struggles as he experiences her inability to focus.

Meanwhile, the nerdy girl finds her new life thrilling as she goes to parties, gets to hang out with the cool kids and even is able to physically bully some of the guys.  She flatly admits that she would rather stay HIM, and seems callous to his despair at being stuck in her body.   She does get to talk to some of his friends about their bullying and tries to get them to stop, but it is clear she would rather be a dude and a protector than go back to being a nerdy girl victim.  Of course, things can’t stay easy for her, and she eventually faces struggles when she tries to play his role as a basketball star and fails, consequently becoming the object of scorn and ridicule.

The boy, facing the reality that he may be stuck as her, eventually starts dressing cute and doing things to be more attractive, and he ultimately offers to remain in her body if it will make her happy.  The two fall in love, and what I ultimately loved about this movie was this message- that it was the empathy they each gained, their understanding of the other’s lives, that let them fall in love and appreciate each other.

This can’t be called a perfect film, but the actors are game and do their best to bring these characters to life as people and not just types, and I felt for the characters as they went through their journeys.  I gotta say I dug it, and if you want to check it out you can see it on Amazon.

All Screwed Up on Amazon

Shame, Guilt and Forced Fem


He’s Krystal Kinsey

Why do I love reading stories which portray cross-dressing and feminization as humiliation? Why would someone who sometimes chooses to wear women’s clothes, who has many friends who perform as drag queens, love, and I do mean LOVE, to read stories in which these things are portrayed as the most horrible things that could ever happen to a man?

The Forced Feminization story remains among the most popular and enduring sub-genres within the TG fiction world.  In these stories a man who has no interest in cross-dressing or becoming a woman finds himself forced to dress, act and become either a she-male or a female. Often, the stories feature a sexist womanizer who gets punished for his ways, frequently by a vengeful female.  The males suffer shame, humiliation, embarrassment, horror.   The women who victimize them revel in sadistic glee as the men are stripped of all signs of their swaggering masculinity.

So what makes these stories work?  When I remember my earliest feminine fantasies and explorations, I remember feeling humiliated, embarrassed, ashamed just thinking about girl stuff. Multiply those feelings by 1000 on the occasions I got caught.  So, for me, the emotional core of forced feminization stories mirrors the emotional core of my own journey. But wait, some might say.  No one forced you to drool over dresses and skirts.  You chose that path.

Well, it didn’t feel that way at the time, and it still doesn’t.   In fact, the operative word in my mind was No!  No!  NO!  I knew liking girl things was WRONG, and that it would lead other kids to laugh at me, that it would cost me the regard of my parents. I was horrified by my feminine urges.  I desperately wanted to NOT BE what I was, and yet I couldn’t stop.  In other words, the experience for me was very much as if I were being forced, against my will, by some strange force inside of me, and when that force won out, it was smug and satisfied, and it felt a thrill of pleasure as the boy that I was who’d been screaming no… no… no… put on that dress.  That feminine power within me reveled in glee, just like the “villains” in so many forced fem stories.  I was both the guy who fought being feminized, and the gleeful female determined to make it happen.

I felt like I was being forced into femininity by my own mind.

In my latest story, He’s Krystal Kinsey, I explore this dynamic in what I like to think of as a Lured Feminization story.  I do have the alpha woman, Adan Karline, who wants to feminize a straight man, and my main character does not want to be a woman, but Adan is a subtle seductress who lures the male into his new life, rather than overtly forces him as  an act of dominance.  I have explored the forcible kind before– where the man is forcibly femmed either through blackmail, kidnapping or in a more violent way.  But in this story I decided to make it more sneaky, to make Adan more like that feminine force in my brain who made me want what I so terrible feared.

In He’s Krystal Kinsey, Adan convinces Arthur that he can get all of the things he craves; fame, popularity, esteem, wealth, by becoming more feminine.  Arthur desperately wants to be famous with all that involves, and so he allows himself to gradually be feminized by Adan who intends, ultimately, to convince Arthur to get a sex-change and live as woman and her lover.

What are you willing to do for fame?  Adan asks Arthur when they first meet.  “Anything,” he replies, and that becomes the basis of his relationship with her, and with himself.

Check it out at Amazon.com: Krystal Kinsey

Zerophilia and the Freedom to Choose

Warning:  Spoilerish Material Included!


Image:  Luke in female form with his best buddy.

Do you want to be a guy?  Or a girl? You can be one or the other, but not both. You have to choose.

This message is delivered to Luke, the main character in Zerophilia, who has discovered that he can switch sexes.  His buddy wants to him to stay a dude and can’t understand why anyone would want to be female.  His buddy’s girlfriend, on the other hand, thinks it would be fine if he decided to become a girl full time, and she even buys him a dress.  They all tell him they are fine with whatever choice he makes, but they do want him to make a choice.

What does Luke want?  Luke wants both.  He is attracted to both men and women, and though he rebels against the notion of becoming female, he ultimately goes so far as to put on a dress and make out with a boy he has a crush on.  Luke is not only ambivalent when it comes to his sexual interests, but he is sweet and sensitive while also loving sports and driving around in a big truck.  In other words, he lives in a world where he is both masculine and feminine, and he has never been able to choose just one.  This beautifully blurry existence continues even when he is unwillingly trapped in a female body.

The film has a happy ending for our protagonist and a positive message for those who shift along gender lines.   It turns out that all Luke needs to do is find someone else like him, someone else who kinda sort likes being both masculine and feminine.  When Luke does find his “soul mate” we see their relationship in montage; sometimes Luke is the girl, sometimes he is the guy, sometimes they are both guys, sometimes both girls.

The films message?  Those who don’t care to choose don’t have to choose.  They just have to seek out their tribe and find people who are cool with gender fluidity.

Check out the website, and Zerophilia is currently available on Amazon.com instant video as well!




Turnabout Intruder: Thoughts and Speculations


“She could have had as rich a life as any woman.  If only… If only….”

The last lines of the last episode of the original Star Trek television series, and the first body swap story I remember ever seeing.  I was young– pre-teens, and I loved Star Trek, which was in constant re-runs on the UHF stations that broadcast out of Detroit back in the 1970s.

Growing up without a father, I had chosen Captain James T. Kirk as a hero and role model, so it was a strange and fascinating thing to see this episode in which he found himself trapped in the body of a woman.  My hero?  my role model?  A girl?  Yet, early in the episode, the characters who put Kirk in that body still refer to him as a he, despite the female form.

Aha!  That excited and interested me.  He was still a he, even though he was a girl?

The episode raised a lot of questions that I had never really consider, particularly in the court martial scenes. “You claim to be Captain Kirk?”  Lester asks, smirking and laughing at the red-haired woman wearing some kind of weird mod pantsuit.

“No,”  Kirk answers.  “I claim that whatever makes James Kirk a unique entity is being held in this body.”    What I heard him saying, though I didn’t have the words, was, “I am not my body.  The thing that makes me who I am is not this woman’s shape.”

The essence of a person, their gender, their THEM, was independent of their form.  Being, to borrow philosophical terms later in life, was independent of essence.

The iconic nature of the role reversal that lit up my young mind.  Kirk, in the woman’s body, being carried around effortlessly by the man, like the women on the covers of my mother’s romance novels.  Kirk on his knees after being physically over-powered by his former male body.  Kirk, reaching for and grabbing Spock’s hand.  Placed in a woman’s body, Kirk was forced into a woman’s traditional role, pleading with the men in his life to rescue him.  In the end, of course, he saves himself through action, as men are supposed to do, but it is not as a man that James Kirk saved himself; it was as a woman, and that to me seemed to suggest that biology was not, as some would suggest, destiny.

Though I believe it may have been an attempt at a feminist statement, the episode has since been condemned for being sexist, retrograde.  The woman in Kirk’s body is prone to fits of hysteria, loves to file her nails and proves incapable of commanding a star ship.  At one point when she complains about the lack of opportunity for women,Kirk agrees with her that life is unfair for women, but with the kind of dismissive “Whaddya gonna do?”  attitude that is still far too prevalent.   The last lines of the episode are specific.   She could have lived a life as rich as any woman.  Not, clearly, as rich as any man, which was the real issue.

Still, I feel it holds up well both as an exploration of the cost of gender bias as well as a exploration of a body swapping gender reversal.  In the end, Lester’s ultimate defeat and punishment is to be trapped in a traditional gender role– to be dependent on a man for her care and protection.  What could be a more powerful statement against the notion of domestic bliss as the be all and end all for women than the image of a woman, broken and weeping with despair at the thought of being stuck marrying a doctor who wants her to just stop striving and be his wife?  And that was back when television shows portrayed that every woman on Earth creamed her jeans at the thought of marrying a doctor.

If you haven’t seen it, or haven’t seen it lately, check it out on Amazon or Netflix,  Sandra Smith is great as Captain Kirk:



The word identity comes from the Latin word Identidem, which meant “repeatedly.”  As in, what

we do69d1bd9efd970a7e9d9ab8.L._V356027642_SX200_ repeatedly defines us, identifies us, makes us who we are, so a person who works as a blacksmith, pounding metal into useful shapes day after day, year after year, had the identity of a blacksmith due to the repeated actions they took.

My own reality, of course, and one of the reasons I have always been fascinated by gender fluidity, even before I knew such a term existed, is because I have always been in flux, have always felt I was constantly shifting from one place to another.   Some days I was quite content to do activities that the world considered boy activities, to dress and play the part.

But other days, I would have an urge to indulge in things that were “only for girls,” and I grew up in a household where exhibiting any interest in girl things was a sign of weakness, a failing, something that made me a bad person.  I can distinctly remember the times I got caught;  Once, I decided to play with a Barbie make-over toy my sister had; it was a large Barbie head you could put make-up on, do her hair.   What I remember most is laughter, a kind of harsh, angry laughter, and being sat and talked to, told that boys don’t play with make-up.

Another time I got caught playing with an easy bake oven, as much because I wanted to eat the food as anything else, but my parents reacted in horror at the thought I was playing housewife, and again I got talked to despite the fact that even my young mind grasped the fact that the baker at the bakery we sometimes visited was a man, and that no one seemed to feel he was broken.

I have tried to man up at times in my life, suspecting that I could be happier if I were more “normal” but it just isn’t in me.   And I feel very fortunate to live at a time when it is becoming more and more acceptable for people to express themselves without regard to gender norms.  I am able to go to the gym wearing tights, or a “woman’s” tank top if I feel like it, or throw on my dude shorts when that mood takes me.  I no longer feel as ashamed of my tendency to talk with my hands, smile too much, use phrases like, “Oh my God,” that do sometimes get me odd looks.

I continue to shift and slide and morph day to day.  I don’t know if its the phases of the moon or the positioning of the stars, but some days I sit and look at wedding dresses for hours.  Other days I watch football all afternoon and don’t think at all about anything else, and yet other times, maybe the best times, I watch football, feel all butch and think about how cute the cheerleader’s outfits are all at the same time.  More and more, I don’t worry about what the world might define as masculine or feminine hobbies or interests.  I only concern myself with what I find interesting.

What I do repeatedly, what identifies me, is I accept what I feel, and embrace the fact that I don’t belong to any specific gender check box.  My identity is fluid, and that doesn’t make me a good or bad person.  It just makes me.

Hello world!


Welcome to Gender Fluid News!

I’m a TG artist who creates books and visual compositions under the name cooper.  This blog will be my place to serve the TG community by sharing a few kinds of things:

1.  Great TG work I discover by other artists
2. My thoughts on gender and identity and how they are portrayed in the arts.
3. News and any interesting gender-related material that comes my way.

I will update this blog weekly, and hope people will enjoy and be inspired by the content as I explore my own life long fascination with all things gender.

Please feel free to share any gender-related materials you love with me.  I will be publishing reviews of TG media, and these will be what is reviews rather than what I think should be.